And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
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