Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
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