Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Randomize
