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• (337): View more from Louisiana

  They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.

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• (214): View more from Texas

  I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot

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• (619): View more from California

  I'm passing your future prison.

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• (201): View more from New Jersey

  He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.

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• (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.

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• (281): View more from Texas

  Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.

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• (612): View more from Minnesota

  At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA

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• (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."

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• (226): View more from Ontario

  Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.

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• (732): View more from New Jersey

  And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.

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