That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
