stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
I need moral support for this bender
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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