I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Randomize
