Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
