Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Randomize
