YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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