After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
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