Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
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