mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Randomize
