What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
