Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
another moral hangover. fuck.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
Randomize
