Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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