just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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