The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Help me help you realize you are a moron
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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