Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Randomize
