she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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