I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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