I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
Randomize
