a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Randomize
