this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
