We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize