I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
