I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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