Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Randomize
