Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
We are two peas in an std pod
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
