i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
just come out here and I will go home with you...
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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