i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
