on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Drunk is a universal language darling
Randomize
