Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
Randomize