where am i from again
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
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