i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize