if i can run in heels then i can drive
we made out on top of his cat.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
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