i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Randomize
