no. you can't hotbox the world.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
