Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
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