Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
You're a waste of cheezeits
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I just forgot I was standing up.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
Randomize