I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
