He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Randomize
