I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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