i wish my penis had a tongue
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
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