I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Randomize