Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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