Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
