Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
