"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
If that was your dad, he is hot
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize