He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
When are your genitals available?
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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